Monday, May 15, 2006

Why "National Guard to Mexican Border!" Won't Play

So we're going to send our National Guard troops to "protect us" from the South-of-the-Border Hoard? Here's why Bush's latest knee-jerk attempt to rally his xenophobic base won't play on Main Street:

Most policy announcements of these sort have no direct impact on the vast majority of Americans. By this I don't mean they may not have profound hidden effects, but the general perception is likely to be a sort of distracted "well, that sounds like a good idea..." . So although border issues are probably scrutinized much more carefully by Americans living close to our borders, for most of the country it's an abstract issue. Spend tax money on this, keep tax money from going to that, disaster assistance in some other state; all kind of abstract.

But the National Guard might be your son or daughter; it's also likely to be your next door neighbor; it's one or more of the guys you work with. And unlike the active military, the Guard is made up of people living and working in your community, often professionals, and normally used to spending one weekend a month and two weeks a year on active duty. they're not sequestered on big military bases and the communities surrounding them; they come from every corner of the U.S.

Both the active military and the National Guard are both currently stretched to the breaking point, and their recruiting goals are routinely not met even as the eligibilty standards are routinely lowered. So when people in the Guard hear that Bush is going to have the National Guard patrol our southern border, they're naturally going to assume he means them. And so will their boss, and so will their freinds, and so will their families.

And then, they're going to learn that Bush, and the Republicans that control congress, cut 9,700 border patrol jobs from the 2006 budget! That's right, in 2005, when they where ramrodding their budget through congress, they thought it was a good idea to cut the number of border patrol agents protecting our borders this year! Agents who's job is protecting our borders. Agents who are actually trained to PATROL OUR BORDERS (which is why their job title is particularly appropriate). To be replaced with: your mechanic, your Sherriff's deputy, your IT guy at work, your next-door-neighbor, your daughter, your husband, your mom.

And all this not to keep out terrorists, but to keep the gentle people who harvest your food and mow your lawn from entering the country?

This shit ain't gonna fly.

Friday, May 12, 2006

The Premier of TKNF!!1!

That's right, it's the premiere of Tree-Kawters-Nekkid-Friday.

As you know, I'm very sensitive, so please be gentle in your comments.

Saturday, May 06, 2006

Why Does Jesus Hate America? (And I don't mean your gardener)

Wassup with Jesus?!? It's occurs to me that Jesus is probably all weepy about our wanting to kick the illegals back to their South American gutter, but of course he's already got a pretty sweet gig. Me, I'd probably be sitting in an endowed chair by now if it wasn't for Juan and Pepe undercutting my future with their cheap labor.

And why isn't he laying some rightous Old Testament Wrath on the A-rabs, instead of hanging back and boo-hooing from the sidelines?!?

I'll tell you why: JESUS HATES AMERICA.

That's right, after all the praying and cross burning and heathen whipping we've done for that asshole, this is the thanks we get.


Don't that just fucking tear it?!?

Damn. Now what the fuck we gonna do...